


Firefly

by pushingthesenses



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Rey Doesn't Exist, Empress!Reader, F/M, Force-Sensitive Reader, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, Wife!Reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-28
Updated: 2020-11-28
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:26:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27748222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pushingthesenses/pseuds/pushingthesenses
Summary: You'd follow him anywhere.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 48





	Firefly

**Author's Note:**

> AO3's rich text editor is my arch nemesis so if you see any spaces between words and punctuation...I'm sorry, I tried to chase em' all down. 
> 
> A tumblr request from the wonderful [svpremekylo](https://svpremekylo.tumblr.com/). My headcanon queen and literal muse, who inspires so much of my creativity as of late. The request is as follows:
> 
> _hii cutie pie! can i please ask for your thoughts about kylo coming severely injured from his latest mission and waking up to his wife holding his hand, watching over him and reminiscing about the moment she knew she was in love with him thinking he is sleeping and won't hear her confess she's been fascinated for longer than she'd like to admit_

You’ll never forget the first time you laid eyes on him. 

You were just a girl, a child, really. Thirteen standard years, wandering around your village with little to do. Your planet was a quiet one, sequestered in the far reaches of the outer rim. You were _supposed_ to be running errands for your parents, though you much preferred to roam the rubble paths of the marketplace, conversing with vendors and droids alike. 

You felt him before you saw him. 

A wash of blue, a glaze of celestial energy that wound around your bones. You turned your head, your arms covered in goosebumps despite the heat, and he was there. Watching. Frozen in time, just as you were. And the silence that encompassed the village then, was like nothing you’d ever experienced. There was no sound. No children squealing, no Jawa’s chittering. Just you. And just him. 

The weight of it, that heavy, palpable silence - it hung between you, a static buzzing crept up and up your arms. He stepped closer, and closer still. His eyes, soft and open and _kind_ , always trained on _you_. He was a boy, a teenager like you, but he was so tall, all lean and gangly. He hadn’t quite grown into his frame, and you remember thinking as much. His dark hair fell to his shoulders, sliding across the beige material that covered them as he cocked his head curiously to the side. 

“You,” he murmured, his voice gentle and slow. “You can feel this.”

You were so enamoured, so enraptured by him - you’d never seen anything, _anyone_ so ethereal. But the way his pale skin shone in the glow of the sun, he looked divine. Like he was born of stars, of _nebulas_. 

That was the last time you saw your planet, your parents. You followed him to his Master’s ship. You followed him to their temple. You followed him in training. But you would have followed him anywhere. You were never a child to believe in the Maker, but you believed in _him_ . Strong, patient, and oh, so beautiful. Nothing in the night skies, in the depth of the cosmos, could have ever compared to the gleam in his eyes or the curl of his hair. But he was out of your reach. Because you were a Jedi, and so was he. And no matter how he looked at you, no matter how often he plagued your dreams, he’d never be yours. And a being as remarkable, as _mighty_ as him could never love or desire a girl like you. Of that, you’re sure. So you stand at his side, loyal to the last, because you swore to one another that no matter what, you’d have each other. 

So when the darkness rose higher, when the violent ache in his core could no longer be ignored, you remained. You watched as the lightning struck the temple, you watched as your fellow students screamed and burned. And you followed him. Because you’d follow him anywhere. 

You’d never quite aligned with the teachings of the Jedi, and though you’d never admit it, part of you was glad to see the temple crumble. You’d struggled with your own morality, your own pull to each side of the force. You balanced precariously in the middle ground, dancing along the lines of purgatory, gliding seamlessly between heaven and hell. And eventually, though he sat beside you, right there in his ship - you found him there. In hell, burning red and waiting, longing. Souls collided in a silent burst, a supernova of galactic proportions. And you told him then, amidst the flames, you’d be forever his. You’d be his balance, you’d be his light, you’d be his darkness. You’d be whatever he needed, and whatever he needed he could freely take. 

And that, he did. 

He took your love and kept it as fuel, falling at your feet in an act of devotion you’ll never understand. Because you stayed. Because you understood. Because you took him for the man he was and loved him all the same. The passion, the dedication that burned between you was enough to pull tides, to steer planets, to bind the universe itself. You, his Empress, his equal. Him, your Leader, your _love_.

And to see him now, wounded and vulnerable and still _so_ beautiful - it sparks that memory. That moment of your first meeting, the glow of his skin, the warmth of his gaze. You trail your fingers across his bare skin, counting each freckle as you go. He’s healing, deep in sleep, and you can’t help but wonder if he _knows_. If he knows how many days, how many nights you spent thinking of his touch, of his smile, before you were fortuitous enough to call him yours. 

“I’ve never told you this,” you whisper, moving to gently stroke his sweat-soaked hair. “How long I’ve loved you. I don’t remember the moment it dawned on me. Maybe there wasn’t one, though. Perhaps it was _always_ you,” you smile to yourself, recalling the memories, the moments you loved him more. “But I remember every time I fell in love with you a little more. A little deeper. Like that time you wrote my name on that old parchment while you were practicing your calligraphy. I still have that, you know,” you twirl a raven lock around your index finger. “Or that time you thought I was mad at you for doing better than me in class, so you took me to that planet...Force, I can’t remember the name. But you brought me there, into the forest, and showed me a sea of glowing, living little things. Little bugs that looked like stars. Fireflies, you called them. And I thought they were so beautiful, but nothing could have compared to you, my love,” you lean down, grazing your lips across his temple. “And nothing ever will.” 

And when you turn on your side, letting sleep and dreams of fireflies find you, you don’t feel him. You don’t feel the graze of his lips, or the glide of a hand through your hair. You don’t feel the warmth of his breath against your ear, or how he kisses softly against your neck. Nor do you hear him, when he whispers into your skin. 

  
“And it was always _you_ , my love.”

**Author's Note:**

> [come chat with me on tumblr, if you wanna](https://kkysolo.tumblr.com/)


End file.
